Why I Run Part V and VI: Agony and The Void

Oatmeal Comic Response Part V and VI: Agony and The Void

Agony:

OK.  So I don't really have a whole lot to say about this one.  I haven't really experienced this.  I have certainly experienced pain while running.... dehydration, sore muscles, MY version of crazy hills (which are definitely NOT an actual mountain.)  I definitely know that feeling when you finally get some sugar, some water, some beer, though.  And I love the Godzilla-like monster's big ol' tall glass of nope.

The Void:

Again.  I haven't really had such a deep and amazingly life-full moment as this via running (yet.)  I have had tiny little snippets of something similar, though. The AMAZING feeling when you conquer a hill that has always beasted you.  The JOY of a well timed afternoon shower, or realizing that you DO have another bottle of water stashed in the car.  One of my first longer runs in the summer heat, where both my running partner and I were woefully under prepared hydration wise, only to discover an organized running group's water stop and encouragement at our turnaround point.  Again - the feeling as the finish line came in to view at the end of my first half marathon.  GREAT feelings, all.  Feelings that made me forget any job stress.  Forget if my pace wasn't what I wanted.  Forget that I hurt.  Forget that I am x number of years old and haven't met x, y, and z goals yet.  Escapism isn't a super healthy coping mechanism as a general rule.  But, man... if I can find that in running - if it can help me focus on the positive, focus on what I can accomplish, focus on gratitude towards people, and weather, and happenstance.... all while improving my cardiovascular fitness, building muscle, and improving the probability for a long, healthy life?  I WILL TAKE IT.

I don't run very fast.  I run with distractions, and love listening to podcasts (especially NPR, which allows me to connect with the larger world around me and increase my knowledge) while running.  I, too, have the same noise in my head - to the point where I NEED the distraction of music, podcasts, etc, when I run, because otherwise I WILL think too much about my life, about my job, about my relationships, about world peace and starving children and the whales.   Along with the voice(s) in my ear (I only run with one earbud in, for safety reasons), running also helps me to forget those demons.  It helps me slay the Krakens.  It helps me to silence that damned Blerch.  This comic brings together so eloquently some of the amazing, intangible reasons I run.  Some of the reasons that I KEEP coming back to it, time and time and time again when life gets in the way or the Blerch wins for a few months or whatever it is that takes me away from the habit.

Today I was "supposed" to run the Disney Princess Half  Marathon.  I didn't.  I didn't even GO to Disney, due to lack of training and lack of funds.  I got it in my head that I "should" try to run 13.1 miles over the race weekend to commemorate it, however.  It took 5 runs over the course of 3 days, but I did it.  I BEASTED that goal, partially due to the fact that I should not try to do math at the end of a run.  I ran 14.9 miles over the course of 3 days, when I wasn't sure  I could manage 13.1.  I got to spend a beautiful weekend at the beach with my husband.  I got to run at the beach, which I hate because it is hard but I LOVE because it is beautiful and it is calming; because there are people and there are puppies and there are piers and dunes and lighthouses.  Take THAT Blerch.  Take THAT Kraken.  Take THAT doubts and demons.

THIS is why I run.